I've lost count of the number of HR people I've shocked by showing the labour code definitions of what "flexible hours" and "flexible time" actually mean, legally.
Usually the response is to quietly replace it in all internal documents with "variable start time" and "core hours" and hope nobody notices it.
- You can set your own work hours (as long as they include the core hours and you get signed permission from your manager and their manager and they're allowed to deny your shifted time at any point if it interferes with "operational needs". The manager defines what "operational needs" means).
- You only need to come into the office twice a week (but we'll tell you which days to come in, you need to make up any days you miss, and we can change those days with very little notice; oh and we have the results from a wellness survey that said that people who worked from home more had better mental health and overall wellness than those who worked in the office and decided the solution was to add a mandatory in-office day).
- We encourage you to take sick time when you need it (but only if you can't shift your lunch break to cover or move those workhours to a different day; and if you are supposed to be in the office that day, you must shift your in-office day to another day that week; and we will message you if you are taking too many sick hours; and we will tell you that you can't use sick time for non-specialist doctor's appointments even though policy says that you can use sick time for any medical appointments).
We’re so flexible.”
^ not even satirized. Legitimate policies/rules/conversations.
I worked for a company a few decades back bragged about having a work from home policy, when such things were rare.
HR told employees that it would allow them to deal with doctor's appointments, sick children, plumbing emergencies, snowstorms, subway outages, and things like that.
Of course, to work from home, you needed a company laptop, which no one had. The policy required that you submit a request to your manager 48 hours prior, and he would ask IT to configure a laptop for you. If they had one available (which they rarely did), and if they could configure it without messing it up (even rarer), then they would graciously allow you to work from home.
People pointed out to HR that this required staff to be aware two days ahead of time that their child was going to be sick, that there was going to be a subway failure or transport trailer collision on the highway, that their water pipe was going to burst, etc.
HR's response was that you could make an "emergency request", come in to the office, pick up a laptop, take it home, and *then* work from home.
HR sent a survey regarding the policy, wanting quotes for an upcoming job fair. The most common comment was "our policies are absurd and treat us like children".
Oddly enough, they didn't use any employee comments at the job fair.
Oh the good times I was having back then when I didn't know that when they said you were expected to be flexible at work it meant being willing to bend over, deeply and often.
I've lost count of the number of HR people I've shocked by showing the labour code definitions of what "flexible hours" and "flexible time" actually mean, legally.
Usually the response is to quietly replace it in all internal documents with "variable start time" and "core hours" and hope nobody notices it.
"We're very flexible:
- You can set your own work hours (as long as they include the core hours and you get signed permission from your manager and their manager and they're allowed to deny your shifted time at any point if it interferes with "operational needs". The manager defines what "operational needs" means).
- You only need to come into the office twice a week (but we'll tell you which days to come in, you need to make up any days you miss, and we can change those days with very little notice; oh and we have the results from a wellness survey that said that people who worked from home more had better mental health and overall wellness than those who worked in the office and decided the solution was to add a mandatory in-office day).
- We encourage you to take sick time when you need it (but only if you can't shift your lunch break to cover or move those workhours to a different day; and if you are supposed to be in the office that day, you must shift your in-office day to another day that week; and we will message you if you are taking too many sick hours; and we will tell you that you can't use sick time for non-specialist doctor's appointments even though policy says that you can use sick time for any medical appointments).
We’re so flexible.”
^ not even satirized. Legitimate policies/rules/conversations.
I worked for a company a few decades back bragged about having a work from home policy, when such things were rare.
HR told employees that it would allow them to deal with doctor's appointments, sick children, plumbing emergencies, snowstorms, subway outages, and things like that.
Of course, to work from home, you needed a company laptop, which no one had. The policy required that you submit a request to your manager 48 hours prior, and he would ask IT to configure a laptop for you. If they had one available (which they rarely did), and if they could configure it without messing it up (even rarer), then they would graciously allow you to work from home.
People pointed out to HR that this required staff to be aware two days ahead of time that their child was going to be sick, that there was going to be a subway failure or transport trailer collision on the highway, that their water pipe was going to burst, etc.
HR's response was that you could make an "emergency request", come in to the office, pick up a laptop, take it home, and *then* work from home.
HR sent a survey regarding the policy, wanting quotes for an upcoming job fair. The most common comment was "our policies are absurd and treat us like children".
Oddly enough, they didn't use any employee comments at the job fair.
Have you been looking at my office's group chat 🥹
I have infinitely flexible hours now that I work for the biggest jerk I know (me). 😏
It’s a good one, made me chuckle 😂.
Like unlimited PTOs?
Oh the good times I was having back then when I didn't know that when they said you were expected to be flexible at work it meant being willing to bend over, deeply and often.